The World Is Having Fewer Babies, And So Am I (Maybe)
There’s a quiet hush sweeping across the globe…not the silence of peace, but the space left behind by lives that might have been.
It’s in empty playgrounds, shuttered maternity wards, and the echoing question that hangs in so many minds:
Should I have a child? And if not now…when?
For the first time in history, humanity is choosing not to grow. From Tokyo to Berlin, Seoul to New York, the numbers are dropping. People are waiting longer to have children, having fewer of them, or none at all.
Some are calling it a crisis. Others, a correction.
I’m calling it complicated. Because it is.
I’m 33. I always thought I’d be a mom by now.
But I also thought I’d be financially stable by now.
Emotionally healed. Secure. Safe.
And that version of me? She’s not here yet.
The Global Fertility Shift: By the Numbers
Let’s step back. This isn’t just my story, it’s everywhere.
According to the UN:
In 1950, the global fertility rate was 4.7 children per woman.
In 2023, it was 2.3…less than half.
And by 2050, it’s expected to fall below 2.1, the replacement level.
In wealthy countries, the decline is sharper:
South Korea: 0.78 children per woman (world’s lowest)
Japan: 1.26
Italy: 1.2
United States: 1.66
Even nations once booming with youth (like Brazil, India, and China) are now seeing fertility dips.
This isn’t temporary. It’s structural.
It’s psychological. It’s economic.
And most of all, it’s deeply, achingly personal.
Why People Are Having Fewer Kids
The reasons aren’t mysterious. They’re lived.
1. Financial Instability
Housing is expensive. Childcare is astronomical. Wages have stagnated while costs have skyrocketed. For many would-be parents, it’s not “I don’t want a baby.” It’s “I can’t afford one.”
I know that song. I’ve hummed it at night, staring at my bank account. Wondering if wanting a child without wanting debt was too much to ask.
2. Career Pressure
In a world that values productivity over presence, having a baby can feel like falling behind. Especially for women. Especially for women like me who’ve worked so hard to build something.
Do I step away from the momentum I’ve fought for?
Or do I wait a little longer…and risk waiting too long?
3. Climate and Future Anxiety
More than ever, people are asking: What kind of world would I be bringing a child into?
A warming planet. Rising inequality. Political instability.
It’s a grief-laced question. And while hope still exists, it’s harder to reach for when the headlines are screaming.
4. Relationship Shifts
People are marrying later…or not at all. Many women are choosing to raise children alone, or not at all. Our definitions of family are evolving, and with that comes both liberation and loneliness. I’m on my second marriage, and I am glad I didn’t have kids with my first husband.
Why Time Feels Faster As We Age
As our timelines stretch and expectations shift, it can feel like the years blur. This post explores why time seems to speed up, and how slowing down might help us make decisions from a place of clarity instead of panic.
What It Feels Like to Wait
Here’s what they don’t tell you when you wait:
That your body starts whispering things before your mind is ready.
That you’ll feel joy when a friend gets pregnant…and grief, too. You look around in envy and joy for others. You see family photos of people who are younger than you take that jump and wonder why it worked out for them and not you.
That Google will become a late-night spiral of “fertility over 35” and “how to track ovulation naturally.”
That there’s a sadness in the maybe. In the limbo.
And also…a power.
Because waiting doesn’t mean doing nothing. It means choosing. Carefully. Intentionally. With eyes wide open.
Science Says It’s Not Too Late, But There’s Nuance
Yes, fertility declines with age. But not as fast as fearmongers claim.
Most women under 35 have an 85% chance of conceiving within a year.
At 38, it’s closer to 60–65%.
Egg quantity drops, but quality doesn’t plummet overnight.
There are also more tools than ever:
Hormone testing
Egg freezing
IVF support
Fertility tracking
This isn’t 1990. Science is catching up with reality.
Wearable Fertility Tracker
For those of us walking the line between hope and hesitation, tech can help us stay in tune.
Tempdrop Smart Basal Body Thermometer
Wear it while you sleep to track your ovulation naturally, no daily temp checks required. Great for cycle awareness without pressure.
What This Decline Could Mean for the World
Fewer babies may sound like less chaos, but it comes with its own storms:
1. Aging Populations
Countries with shrinking birth rates will face a worker shortage, and a rapidly aging population. This means fewer people to support social programs, care for the elderly, or drive economic growth. And with less babies than ever dying of illness, the ones that are born are surviving.
2. Shifting Power Structures
Nations with stable or growing populations may gain economic influence. Think: Nigeria, Egypt, India. Global balance is changing.
3. Reimagined Family Models
With fewer children, some families are pouring more time and resources into the ones they have. Others are redefining family altogether, through chosen families, adoption, or communal living.
The question is no longer “how many kids do you want?”
It’s “what does legacy mean to you?”
The Emotional Landscape of Not Knowing
There’s a strange ache in the waiting room of motherhood.
It’s not regret. It’s not resignation. It’s something else.
Something quieter. Like an open door you haven’t walked through yet.
Some days I imagine a little girl with my eyes and his laugh.
Other days, I imagine a life where my legacy is built of words and gardens and the people I’ve poured into.
Both visions feel holy.
Both feel true.
Hope in the Complexity
The birth rate decline isn’t about selfishness. Or apathy.
It’s about change. And maybe, evolution.
We are learning that parenthood is not the only way to create meaning. That families can look a hundred different ways. That waiting isn’t always fear, it’s sometimes love. The love of wanting to give a child a life that’s safe, stable, and full.
And yes, some of us still hope to become mothers.
Even if we do it later.
Even if we do it differently.
You’re Not Behind, You’re Becoming
If you're 33 like me, or 36, or 42…
If you’re staring down the what-ifs, the maybe-laters, the one-day-soons…
I see you.
You’re not late.
You’re becoming.
You’re living.
And whether or not you become a parent in the biological sense, you are already giving life: to ideas, to relationships, to futures not yet named.
The world is having fewer babies.
But maybe that’s making space for something else.
Something thoughtful.
Something true.
Something only you can create.
